Taking Control of Your Life

Use Time Wisely

Reflecting upon the video clip you have just watched, where are you headed in life? Do you let life control you or do you control life?

"I am so thoroughly convinced that if we don't set goals in our life and learn how to master the techniques of living to reach our goals, we can reach a ripe old age and look back on our life only to see that we reached but a small part of our full potential. When one learns to master the principles of setting a goal, he will then be able to make a great difference int he results he attains in this life." (Elder M. Russell Ballard)

Follow these guidelines in your life as you set goals:

1. Follow the Spirit
2. Focus on key measurements of your progress
3. Have an action plan of different steps to accomplish
4. Be specific and realistic, but set goals that will make you stretch
5. Set weekly and daily goals
6. Set goals for personal scripture study and study with your spouse
7. Measure your progress each cay, each week and each month. When you fall short of a goal, evaluate your efforts and seek for ways to accomplish the goal. If needed, adjust your expectations. (page 146 Preach My Gospel)

"When perforamnce is meaured, performance improves. When performance is measured and reported, the rate of improvement accelerates." (President Thomas S. Monson)

Scripture Study

What does it mean to be accountable?
D&C 58:26-33 D&C 101:78 Ezekiel 33:1-6

Why is agency important in accountability?
2 Nephi 2:26-29 Helaman 14:30-31


Suggestion for your journal

It is the end of the month as this lesson is being prepared. Take a few moments to think about where you are in your life right now. Think of what happens when your children will be grown and married.

--What do you want to say you have done as a parent?

--What do you want to have become?

--What differences would you want others to notice in you?

Less Talk - Make It Happen

Getting Things Done - Now


After you watch that humourous video clip about all those "thinking" business people sitting around talking about saving a man, but doing nothing about it, think about how you are making use of time? Are you getting things done?

President Hinckley gently reminds us to do a little better - to continually make improvements.

President Kimball used to describe it this way "lengthen your stride and do it now."

And President Kimball reminded us often about the example of our elder brother, even the Savior Himself and how He went about doing good.

"Jesus was a patient, pleading, loving leader who didn't grow impatient with those he led.

And when Peter drew his sword and smote the high priest's servant and cut off his right ear, Jesus said, "Put up thy sword into the sheath." (John 18:11) Without anger or being perturbed, the incident passed.

You will recall his saying several times, "Come, follow me." His was a program of "Do what I do", rather than "Do what I say." His innate brilliance would have permitted him to put on a dazzling display, but that would have left his followers far behind. He walked and worked with those he was to serve. His was not a long-distance leadership. He was not afraid of close friends or that proximity to him would disappoint his followers. The leaven of true leadership cannot lift others until we are with and serve those to be led.

Jesus kept himself virtuous and thus, when his closeness to the people permitted them to touch the hem of his garment, virtue could flow from him. The woman in the large press of people touched his garment: "For she said, if I may touch but his clothes, I shall be whole. . . . And Jesus, immediately knowing in himself that virtue had gone out of him, turned about in the press, and said, Who touched my clothes?" (Mark 5:8, 30)

We are not perfect as Jesus was, but unless those about us can see us striving and improving, they will not be able to look to us for example and they will see us as less than fully serious about the things to be done." [Spencer W. Kimball, "The Perfect Executive," Insights and Perspectives (a publication for employees of the Corporation of the President) 1 (May 1977)

Are we serious about the things we need to do? What needs to be done in your life? And how should you we do it?

I remember a BYU Devotional where an MTC President Max Pinegar gave a talk on this subject.

He first reminded us of a quote from Sir Charles Morell said, "The first great gift we can bestow on others is a good example" (Quote Book, p. 190). Can the world, in fact, look to us for example? Or will those about us see us as less than fully serious about our religious convictions? What needs to be done? And how do we do it?

In another example, Brother Pinegar told of Michelangelo, who chiseled away at a block of stone for months; eventually Moses resulted. When a man asked him how he had done it, he simply replied, "I just chiseled away until everything that wasn't Moses wasn't there."

So ask yourself: What needs to be done? It is a wise man who follows the counsel of the prophets. And what has he President Hinckley counseled?

Activity: (Look at recent General Conferences and identify counsel from our living prophet or the other 14 men we sustain as prophets, seers and revelators) Then, list how we will do it.


There is urgency in the clarion call of our prophets to respond to their challenges. We might have to sacrifice some of the things we enjoy doing in order to accomplish what prophets have asked us to do.

Perhaps less computer time or fewer dvds? Perhaps less sleep? Think of the reference in Proverbs 20:13, the first part of the verse, that says, "Love not sleep, lest thou come to poverty."

Are you serious about the things to be done?

Quoting President Kimball, "Unless those about us can see us striving and improving, they will not be able to look to us for example and they will see us as less than fully serious about the things to be done."

So, after this lesson think about "less talk....make it happen!"

Heber J. Grant - 7th President of the Church - Set Goals

FHE Lesson - Achieving Goals - (How Heber J. Grant Did It)

Every year when I get ready to make New Year's Resolutions, I can't help but remember the living and past prophets and the influence they have had on my life. One of the past prophets, Heber J. Grant, was especially known for his ability to set goals and achieve them.

For a Family Home Evening lesson with the grandchildren, it would be worthwhile to tell a few of the stories of Heber J. Grant and his accomplishments. This is not only motivational, but helps us learn a little more about this prophet. President Heber J. Grant often quoted the following statement, which is sometimes attributed to Ralph Waldo Emerson:
"That which we persist in doing becomes easier to do. Not that the nature of the thing has changed but that our ability to do has increased”.

The following stories that President Heber J. Grant or others have recorded about his youth illustrates his determination to overcome obstacles:

Learning to Pitch A Baseball

“Being an only child, my mother reared me very carefully. Indeed, I grew more or less on the principle of a hothouse plant, the growth of which is ‘long and lanky’ but not substantial. I learned to sweep, and to wash and wipe dishes, but did little stone throwing and little indulging in those sports which are interesting and attractive to boys, and which develop their physical frames. Therefore, when I joined a baseball club, the boys of my own age and a little older played in the first nine; those younger than I played in the second, and those still younger in the third, and I played with them.

“One of the reasons for this was that I could not throw the ball from one base to the other. Another reason was that I lacked physical strength to run or bat well. When I picked up a ball, the boys would generally shout:

“‘Throw it here, sissy!’

“So much fun was engendered on my account by my youthful companions that I solemnly vowed that I would play baseball in the nine that would win the championship of the Territory of Utah.

“My mother was keeping boarders at the time for a living, and I shined their boots until I saved a dollar which I invested in a baseball. I spent hours and hours throwing the ball at Bishop Edwin D. Woolley’s barn, which caused him to refer to me as the laziest boy in the Thirteenth Ward. Often my arm would ache so that I could scarcely go to sleep at night. But I kept on practicing and finally succeeded in getting into the second nine of our club. Subsequently I joined a better club, and eventually played in the nine that won the championship of the territory and beat the nine that had won the championship for California, Colorado, and Wyoming. Having thus made good my promise to myself, I retired from the baseball arena” (Gospel Standards, comp. G. Homer Durham [1969], 342–43).

Reading the Book of Mormon

President Heber J. Grant wrote about his experience in first reading the Book of Mormon:

“I can remember very distinctly when Uncle Anthony Ivins . . . said to me and to his son, Anthony C. Ivins:

“‘Heber, Anthony, have you read the Book of Mormon?’

“We answered, ‘No.’

“He said, ‘I want you to read it. I want you to pledge to me that you will not skip a word, and to the one who reads it first, I will give a pair of ten dollar buckskin gloves with beaver tops.’

“Any boy of fourteen who had a pair of those gloves thought he was ‘it.’ I remember that my mother had urged me to read systematically the Book of Mormon, but I had not done it. I determined to read the book, say, twenty-five pages a day and get the benefit of its contents. I believed its contents were true because my mother and many others had told me so; and because of the testimony of the teacher of the class that Richard W. Young and I attended, I thought that to win the gloves I would have to read the book so rapidly that I would get no benefit; and therefore decided to let Anthony win the gloves.

“I met my cousin, Anthony C., the next morning, and he asked, ‘How many pages have you read?’

“I said: ‘I have read twenty-five pages.’

“He said: ‘I have read over one hundred and fifty. I sat up until after midnight.’

“I said: ‘Good-bye gloves.’

“I went on reading twenty-five pages a day and occasionally I got so interested that I read fifty or seventy-five pages, and, lo and behold, I got through first and got the gloves. He got such a good start he did not bother to read any more until after I got through with the book” (Gospel Standards, 350–51).

Learning How To Be A Fine Penman

“One day Heber was playing marbles with some other boys when the bookkeeper from the Wells Fargo Company Bank was walking down the other side of the street. One of the boys remarked, ‘That man gets $150.00 a month.’ Heber figured to himself that not counting Sundays, that man made $6.00 a day and that at five cents a pair, he would have to black 120 pairs of boots to make $6.00. He there and then resolved that some day he would be a bookkeeper in the Wells Fargo and Company’s bank. In those days all the records and accounts of the bank were written with a pen, and one of the requisites of a good bookkeeper was the ability to write well. To learn to write well was his first approach to securing this job and the fulfilment of his resolve; so he set to work to become a penman.

“At the beginning his penmanship was so poor that when two of his chums were looking at it one said to the other, ‘That writing looks like hen tracks.’ ‘No,’ said the other, ‘it looks as if lightning had struck an ink bottle.’ This touched Heber’s pride and, bringing his fist down on his desk, he said, ‘I’ll some day be able to give you fellows lessons in penmanship.’ . . .

“He secured a position as bookkeeper and policy clerk in an insurance office at fifteen. About this he said: ‘I wrote a very nice hand, and that was all that was needed to satisfactorily fill the position which I then had. Yet I was not fully satisfied but continued to dream and scribble when not otherwise occupied. . . . I learned to write well, so well, that I often made more before and after office hours by writing cards, invitations, and making maps than the amount of my regular salary. At nineteen I was keeping books and acting as policy clerk for Henry Wadsworth, the agent of Wells Fargo and Company. My time was not fully employed, and I was not working for the company but for the agent personally. I did the same as I had done in Mr. White’s bank, volunteered to file a lot of bank letters, etc., and kept a set of books for the Sandy Smelting Company, which Mr. Wadsworth was doing personally. My actions so pleased Mr. Wadsworth that he employed me to do the collecting for Wells Fargo and Company and paid me $20.00 a month for this work in addition to my regular compensation of $75.00 from the insurance business. Thus I was in the employ of Wells Fargo and Company and one of my day-dreams had become a reality’” (Bryant S. Hinckley, Heber J. Grant: Highlights in the Life of a Great Leader [1951], 39–42).

“When Heber, still in his teens, was working as a policy clerk in the office of H. R. Mann and Co., he was offered three times his salary to go to San Francisco as a penman. He later became teacher of penmanship and bookkeeping at the University of Deseret (University of Utah). . . .

“At one of the territorial fairs in which he had not competed, he noticed the exhibits of four professional penmen. He remarked to the man in charge of the art department that he could write better than that before he was seventeen years of age. The man in charge laughed and said that nobody but a cheeky insurance agent would make such a remark. He handed the gentleman three dollars which was the fee necessary to compete for a diploma and sent for the specimen which he had written before he was seventeen and hung it up with the remark, ‘If you judges know good penmanship, when you see it, I will get the diploma.’ He walked away with a diploma for the best penmanship in the territory. He encouraged the art of good penmanship among the youth of Zion and offered many prizes for the best specimens” (Hinckley, Heber J. Grant, 40–41).

Teaching Himself How to Sing

As with baseball and penmanship, Heber J. Grant was determined to learn to sing, despite the negative opinions of others. Years of practicing brought moderate success. He wrote:

“My mother tried to teach me when I was a small child to sing but failed because of my inability to carry a tune.

“Upon joining a singing class taught by Professor Charles J. Thomas, he tried and tried in vain to teach me when ten years of age to run the scale or carry a simple tune and finally gave up in despair. He said that I could never, in this world, learn to sing. Perhaps he thought I might learn the divine art in another world. Ever since this attempt, I have frequently tried to sing when riding alone many miles from anyone who might hear me, but on such occasions could never succeed in carrying the tune of one of our familiar hymns for a single verse, and quite frequently not for a single line.

“When I was about twenty-five years of age, Professor Sims informed me that I could sing, but added, ‘I would like to be at least forty miles away while you are doing it.’ . . .

“Upon my recent trip to Arizona, I asked Elders Rudger Clawson and J. Golden Kimball if they had any objections to my singing one hundred hymns that day. They took it as a joke and assured me that they would be delighted. We were on the way from Holbrook to St. Johns, a distance of about sixty miles. After I had sung about forty tunes, they assured me that if I sang the remaining sixty they would be sure to have nervous prostration. I paid no attention whatever to their appeal, but held them to their bargain and sang the full one hundred. One hundred and fifteen songs in one day, and four hundred in four days, is the largest amount of practicing I ever did.

“Today [1900] my musical deafness is disappearing, and by sitting down to a piano and playing the lead notes, I can learn a song in less than one-tenth the time required when I first commenced to practice” (Gospel Standards, 351–52, 354).

Gaining A Burning Testimony

“Before I was twenty-four I was made the president of the Tooele Stake of Zion. I announced in a speech that lasted seven and a half minutes that I would ask no man in Tooele to be a more honest tithe payer than I would be; that I would ask no man to give more of his means in proportion to what he had than I would give; I would ask no man to live the Word of Wisdom better than I would live it, and I would give the best that was in me for the benefit of the people in that stake of Zion.

“That night I heard in the dark a man say in a contemptuous way: ‘It is a pity if the General Authorities have to send a man out here to preside, . . . that they could not have sent one with sense enough to talk at least ten minutes; and that they had to send a boy to preside over us.’

“When I heard this, I remember thinking: ‘The boy is the only one who has any right to complain.’ . . . However, I was not able during the next three or four Sundays to talk as long as I did the first one. I ran out of ideas in five, six, and six and a half minutes.

“At the lunch table after my first short speech which lasted seven and a half minutes, President Smith said: ‘Heber, you said you believe the gospel with all your heart, and propose to live it, but you did not bear your testimony that you know it is true. Don’t you know absolutely that this gospel is true?’

“I answered: ‘I do not.’

“‘What, you! a president of a stake?’ said President Joseph F. Smith.

“‘That is what I said.’

“‘President [John] Taylor, I am in favor of undoing this afternoon what we did this morning. I do not think any man should preside over a stake who has not a perfect and abiding knowledge of the divinity of this work.’

“I said: ‘I am not going to complain.’

“Brother Taylor had a habit, when something pleased him excessively, of shaking his body and laughing. He said, ‘Joseph, Joseph, Joseph, he knows it just as well as you do. The only thing that he does not know is that he does know it. It will be but a short time until he does know it. He leans over backwards. You do not need to worry.’

“I went to the little town of Vernon in Tooele County, took two others with me to do the preaching, and I got up to say a few words and spoke for forty-five minutes with perfect ease under the inspiration of the Lord. That night I shed tears of gratitude to the Lord for the abiding, perfect, and absolute testimony that came into my life of the divinity of this work.

“The next Sunday after speaking at Vernon, I was at Grantsville. I told the Lord I would like to talk forty-five minutes. I got up to speak and ran out of ideas in five minutes, and I was sweating.

“After the meeting I walked out past the farthest house in the west part of Grantsville, I am sure nearly three miles, and I got down behind a haystack and I shed some more tears. But they were tears of humiliation. I made a pledge to God there upon that occasion that never again in my life would I stand up before an audience with the feeling that all I needed to do was just stand up and talk; but that I would get up upon all occasions with a desire to say something that might be of benefit to the people to whom I spoke, and not with the spirit of pride, such as I had that day when I stood up in Grantsville. And I have never failed from that day until now—fifty-odd years ago—to have any desire in my heart when speaking except that I might say or read something that would be of lasting benefit to those who listened to my voice” (Gospel Standards, 191–93).

Activity:

1. Have each child tell one of the Heber J. Grant stories.

2. Play the name game of the Latter Day Prophets:

(Draw A Line Between the First Name and the Last Name of Each of the 15 Prophets of this Dispensation.)

John Brigham Howard W Lorenzo Harold B Joseph Fielding George Albert Gordon B Joseph F Spencer W Ezra Taft Heber J David O Joseph Wilford			Smith Grant Kimball Woodruff Mckay Snow Smith Taylor Smith Lee Young Hinckley Smith Hunter Benson

Abraham Lincoln Set Goals

FHE Lesson for the Grandchildren: What Can We Learn about Abraham Lincoln?

(Why have a lesson about Abe Lincoln at this time of year? Think about what he accomplished. Note how he did not succeed in every one of his goals.)

Background: Abraham Lincoln was born February 12, 1809 in Kentucky into extreme poverty but eventually became President of America. During the American Civil War Lincoln gave the now famous Gettysburg Address and his decision to appoint General Ulysses S. Grant as Commander-in-Chief of the Northern Armies was probably one of the significant turning points of the war. Although it cost him his life, he was fanatical that slavery should be abolished in his country. Lincoln was assassinated In Washington on 14^th April 1865.

When I was in grade school in Billings, Montana as a little boy, I heard an inspiring story about "Honest Abe" ” that to this day I still remember.

The story took place during Abraham Lincoln’s early-teenage years while he was working as a store clerk. It is said that he accidentally overcharged a customer a few extra cents because the scale was not working properly. When he realized the mistake, it was too late, and the customer had already left. He knew the right thing was to return the cents to the customer, so he decided to close the store and go find the customer.

At that time, he couldn’t just jump into a car and drive over there like are able to do today. Instead, it is said that Abraham Lincoln walked several miles to the customer’s house and returned those cents.

Though the story of Abraham Lincoln, the honest shop clerk, is memorable, the less familiar story of Abraham Lincoln, the honest shop owner, is even more impressive. While living in New Salem, Lincoln and a partner bought a general store and attempted to run it as a profitable business. But owing to unwise investments and general mismanagement, the store finally "winked out," to use Lincoln's own phrase.

Not long thereafter his partner died, leaving the unfortunate Lincoln with what he called the "National Debt." But unlike many others who went bankrupt in frontier ventures and skipped town to escape their creditors, Lincoln promised to repay every cent he owed. He fulfilled this promise even though it took him more than fifteen years to retire the debt. When Abraham Lincoln made a commitment, his word was good as gold. No matter what those around him were doing, his life and his words were filled with honesty. (Dare to Be True, pp. 57-58)

Throughout his life, his most striking characteristic was his determination to succeed in the face of continuing failure. He did have successes intermingled with his list of failures, but it is helpful to compile the list of failures.

Consider the following:

Lincoln "Failures" List

• Lost job in 1832
• Defeated for state legislature in 1832.
• Failed in business in 1833.
• Elected to state legislature in 1834.
• Sweetheart died in 1835.
• Had nervous breakdown in 1836.
• Defeated for Speaker in 1838.
• Defeated for nomination for Congress in 1843.
• Elected to Congress in 1846.
• Lost renomination in 1848.
• Rejected for land officer in 1849.
• Defeated for U.S. Senate in 1854.
• Defeated for nomination for Vice President in 1856.
• Again defeated for U.S. Senate in 1858.
• Elected President in 1860.

Quotes from Abraham Lincoln about Goals:

• A goal properly set is halfway reached -
• Things may come to those who wait, but only left by those who hustle.
• Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other one thing.
• To believe in the things you can see and touch is no belief at all; but to believe in the unseen is a triumph and a blessing.
• Be sure your feet are in the right place. Then stand firm.
• My great concern is not whether you have failed, but whether you are content with your failure.

Family Activity:

1. Make a log cabin out of "lincoln logs" and use it on the table as a center piece (best on President's Day in February).
2. Color a picture of Abraham Lincoln
3. Make a list of the accomplishments Abraham Lincoln had in his life
4. Tell the story of the shop clerk in your own words and then share an experience you have had when someone undercharged you at the grocery store. What did you do?

Desire, Decision, Determination

Alma 26:27. “Now when our hearts were depressed and we were about to turn back, behold, the Lord comforted us, and said: Go amongst thy brethren, the Lamanites, and bear with patience thine afflictions, and I will give unto you success.”

• The Lord told Alma and the Sons of Mosiah to "bear with patience thine afflictions, and I will give unto you success." So at their low point, when they were about to throw in the towel, the Lord "comforted them" and then gave them some counsel.

• The word "comfort" in this case has nothing to do with feeling at ease. The root meaning is to "strengthen" so the Lord strengthened them and then counseled them to "bear with patience" that means without complaining, without talking negatively in any way, without downplaying one's own ability to succeed.

Desire. In the preceding verse, verse 26, the missionaries had “the intent that perhaps we might save some few of their souls.” The had the desire to do the work.

Decision. The work was hard, they had thoughts about turning back, but the Lord strengthened them and counseled them. In verse 28, it says “they have come, and been forth among them; and we have been patient in our sufferings”. This shows they were resolute in their decision

Determination. Finally, verse 30 reads “and we have suffered all this, that perhaps we might be the means of saving some soul” demonstrating their determination.

When you are down and when you think it is rough going out there…remember the desire, decision and determination of the Alma and the Sons of Mosiah.

The Promise. Alma 26:22 - “He that repenteth and exerciseth faith, and bringeth forth good works, and prayeth continually without ceasing—unto such it is given to know the mysteries of God; yea, unto such it shall be given to reveal things which never have been revealed; yea, and it shall be given unto such to bring thousands of souls to repentance, even as it has been given unto us to bring these our brethren to repentance.” Repent, exercise faith, bring forth good works and pray continually without ceasing. You will know the mysteries of God in your personal studies and as you testify to others, you will teach the people things that never have been revealed to them, and you will help thousands join the Church.

Why Should We Get Up Early?

In Preach My Gospel, Elder Holland gives this quote: "the first three hours of a mission will either make or break a mission." When we think about our lives, we all have been given the same number of hours. What we do in the morning makes the difference between what we accomplish and what we wish we would have done.

In the scriptures we read:

Abraham rose early to stand before the Lord.
Jacob rose early to worship the Lord.
Moses rose early to meet God at Sinai.
Joshua rose early to lead Israel over the River Jordan.
Sameul rose early to meet Saul.
David rose early to do as his father bade him.
Job rose early to offer sacrifices for his children.
Jesus rose early to go to a solitary place to pray.
The people rose early to go hear him.
The women rose early to go to the sepulcher.
Joseph Smith rose early to ask of God in the Sacred Grove.

Are you like the young man in the picture above? Getting up early makes you ill?

Do you remember Ben Franklin's wise counsel - penned for the second picture above: "early to bed, early to rise, makes a man, healthy, wealthy, and wise."

Do you love to wake up and see the beautiful dawn (see the final two pictures above).

Here are 15 tips on how to get up early:

1. Have a good reason to get up
2. Be Productive in the mornings
3. Get enough sleep
4. Get to bed earlier
5. Sleep more effectively
6. No more another 10 minutes
7. Jump out of bed
8. Use an alarm clock, not just the snooze
9. Establish a stable routine
10. Have something to look forward to
11. Be aware of the consequences
12. Remove the option completely (schedule something)
13. Have a similarly motivated buddy
14. Keep track of your times
15. Review all of the things you have done

Source: Waking Up Early - 15 Tips That Work
June 15th, 2007 by Dave Cheong