5 Tips To Setting New Year's Resolutions

Family Home Evening Lesson on Tips to Seting Goals

"I am so thoroughly convinced that if we don't set goals in our life and learn how to master the techniques of living to reach our goals, we can reach a ripe old age and look back on our life only to see that we reached but a small part of our potential. When one learns to master the principles of setting a goal, he will then be able to make a great difference in the results he attains in this life." (Elder Ballard, page 146 Preach My Gospel)

Goal Setting Tip 1 - Follow the Spirit

Goal setting and planning are acts of faith. Prayerfully set goals that are in harmony with the Savior's commands for us. (page 146, PMG)

Goal Setting Tip 2 - 7 is the magic number

George Miller, a 1950's psychologist, suggested that we can only deal with 7 pieces of information at any one time. If you need to remember any more information, you need to group things into more memorable, manageable chunks. So when you make your New Year's Resolutions, keep goals down to a manageable number and group similar areas.

Goal Setting Tip Number 3 - Be Specific

A common mistake when setting goals, is not enough detail. This could raise concern when you need to spell out the goals to family members, friends, people at work or even to ourselves. As an example of why this is important when goal setting, think of renovating your kitchen.

I have a particular kitchen in mind, which is probably entirely different to the kitchen you're picturing. Does your kitchen have tile or hard wood floor? Are the appliances white or have steel-covered fronts. How large is your kitchen? Is your kitchen full of people or are you the only one that will use it? Imagine the differences of opinions if we had the joint goal of renovating a kitchen together!

Keep New Years resolutions by writing your goals in enough detail for everyone to clearly understand and agree what's meant. So if your goal is to renovate your kitchen, put some flesh on the bones by saying your goal is to renovate your kitchen with putting down hardwood floor, with an island, with big windows, for no more than $20,000.

Goal Setting Tip 4 - Keep it real!

You are more likely to achieve realistic goals. That's not to say you can't shoot for the stars and dream big; break up your mega goal into smaller, more manageable mini goals, and you're more likely to achieve your dream. (Remember Abraham Lincoln lost in everything he tried for until the biggest of goals to be president of the United States. - Don't set that as a goal, by the way. (grin)

Goal Setting Tip 5 - Fantastic Exagerations - The Pretend Game

Here's an unusual game to play. Start a conversation with a family member or a friend. Tell them they are going to help achieve your new year's goals and all they have to do is ask a few key questions.

Start by telling them the story of, for example, your New Years resolution to find and start your dream job. Tell them what it's like in that company, the people you work with and meet as part of your job, what your daily schedule looks like. Get them to ask you questions about how you got there e.g. how did you get the interview, who spotted your business card, how you got the loan to create the company, how you got into that graduate school, etc.

Now this is the test for you to be put on the spot and come up with real answers. Aim to "keep it real" with your answers, e.g. don't rely on a sudden "financial gift" to fund your plans! Try to keep this conversation going as long as you can, with as much detail as you can give.

This might sound insane, to exaggerate or dream like this in telling how you achieved your New Years resolution. The fact is is that the questions people ask will create links in your mind, forging a map that make it easier for you to attain your long term goal. Just make sure you write down specific action steps you took to achieve your goal! (As a side note, when you publicly express a goal to a close friend or family member, you have a greater chance of achieving that goal. It becomes affixed in your mind as something you think about to "save face.")

Fail to Plan, Plan to Fail

Remember: Set weekly action step goals to achieve your New Year's Resolution.
Ask: Are the goals specific?
Ask: Are the goals realistic?
Ask: Will the goals make me stretch?
Ask: Are you committed to the goal?

"When performance is measured, performance improves. When performance is measured and reported, the rate of improvement accelerates." (President Monson, p 150 PMG)

Family Home Activity:

1. Have every member of the family write a list of New Year's resolutions.
2. Record your resolutions in your journal.
3. Post your resolutions on the mirror.
4. Play the imagination game (Tip 5)
5. Talk about how you are doing with your goals and write the detailed action steps in your calendar.
6. Dream big!
7. Take your goals to Heavenly Father for confirmation. If you get a stupor of thought, stop. If not, continue.